so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
i've created a new STD.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
