worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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