I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
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