Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
