found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
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