so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
