Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
