Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
Randomize