is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
Randomize
