the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
can u get pink eye on your cock?
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
Also, beer. Big fan.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
Randomize
