I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
My Sexting was not on an AP level
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
