..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
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