I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
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