would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Randomize