As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
he puts the penis in happiness.
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Randomize
