Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(604): View more from British Columbia

his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed

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(778): View more from British Columbia

i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.

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(201): View more from New Jersey

Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.

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(716): View more from New York

come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!

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(402): View more from Nebraska

What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

You know I told you about that hammering at 3 AM yesterday? Turns out it was Holly beating the lock out of her door with a mallet because she'd forgotten her keys.

(1+44): View more from

Doesn't she keep a spare?

(+44): View more from United Kingdom

Drunk Holly doesn't listen to Sober Holly's plans.

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(289): View more from Ontario

This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.

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(305): View more from Florida

He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.

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(709): View more from Newfndlnd, Labradr

We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night

(709): View more from Newfndlnd, Labradr

Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming

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