Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Randomize