Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
DUDE. I'm missing my big toenail. My bed has blood all over it. WHAT DID WE DO LAST NIGHT?
I don't know, but I chipped my tooth and I'm wearing different underwear.
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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