I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
Randomize
