You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
Randomize
