I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
Brb crying the tears of my youth
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
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