I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
Randomize