Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
