Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
Randomize
