When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
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