don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
My dad is sitting where you rode me
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
Randomize
