i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
Also. After puking outside of the bar last night, some guy (who saw me puking) said I looked like Jennifer Lawrence, called me J Law, got my number and is now texting me. Who knew puking and rallying would do me any good
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Randomize
