don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
Randomize
