i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
I just googled, "what type of cured meat does my face taste like", and one of the top results was, "The Definitive Guide to Bacon." I couldn't make this up if I tried.
Randomize
