I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
Sorry my hands just texted you
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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