I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
worst night to have a conscience
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Randomize
