I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
