I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Randomize
