you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
Randomize
