Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Randomize
