When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
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