Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
Randomize
