But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
Randomize
