There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
Banned from zoo.
Again?
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
I pour the whiskey from now on
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Randomize
