But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
Just found a uh poem I wrote on ambien. It says to "cry your seamen filled tears" and "I hope you take a dagger to your vagina" and at the end it says "sincerely, God". What.the.fuck do they put in that pill?
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
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