So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Randomize