So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
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