Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
Randomize
