Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize