woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
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