remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
there is puke in my bra ... again
Randomize
