So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
This is my gift to your gina
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
