32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
Dude I'm drinking a martini out of a water bottle, I've become my parents.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
Randomize
