She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Randomize
