So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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