His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
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