I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
Randomize
